Mosaic / Reviews / October 26, 2011

When coffee is required

At college, the best gift procrastination has bestowed upon me is the delight of coffee. In my ignorant youth, I turned up my nose at the stuff; now it’s the greatest thing since sliced bread. Here is a quick guide to the best and the worst, for anyone who hasn’t yet pulled enough all-nighters to know the difference. Scored out of 5.

The Beanhive

Score: 5

I’m very biased when it comes to this place since I probably spend more time here than I do in class. However, it really can’t be beat. Even their plain coffee is flavorful (and cheap); if you want less of the coffee and more of the sugar they spice things up with things like Mayan chocolate.


Score: 4

Their coffee is delicious, but it also costs a lot and I’m broke. If you need to write a paper, though, they don’t have WiFi, making it much harder to procrastinate.

The C-Store

Score: 0

…well, once you get past the coffee itself, it’s worth considering that this is some of the earliest-available caffeine on campus and sometimes surviving first hour is more important than flavor. Plus, they’re always willing to make you a fresh pot. And it’s cheap.

On second thought, maybe it’s not so bad. Just make extensive use of the flavored creamer.

The Gizmo

Score: 2.5

They claim their coffee comes from Innkeepers. It’s definitely better than when they didn’t make this claim, but I’m suspicious. Pros: easy access. Cons: even a small coffee requires about four shots of that nasty fake flavoring. Acceptable for late nighters or post-all-nighters only. Their lattes and mochas cost way too much for their taste.

Uncle Billy’s Bakery

Score: 3.5

Uncle Billy’s Bakery (next to Cornucopia on Seminary Street) had a lesser variety of coffee drinks than you’ll find at Innkeeper’s or The Beanhive, in addition to being a bit of a walk, but they’re not bad. However, they do tend to use a high ratio of milk to coffee, so your drink won’t be that strong.

Coffee you make yourself

Score: Depends

Can be made any time of day or night and comes in travel mugs. Add half-and-half for your own breve; cocoa mix is great for a homemade mocha. It does require a French press (prone to mold if not cleaned out) or a coffee pot, which are substantial investments, but if you explain to your roommates that getting one means you won’t bite their heads off in the morning, they might be willing to chip in.

And if you don’t drink coffee, don’t worry, tea has caffeine in it as well. If you aren’t that into tea, try a London fog — earl grey tea seeped in steamed milk. It’s completely delicious without overwhelming you with the taste of leaves.

Katy Sutcliffe

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